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Hammer and Pickle 10:41 Wed Oct 15
Loneliness

"For this (money), we have ripped the natural world apart, degraded our conditions of life, surrendered our freedoms and prospects of contentment to a compulsive, atomising, joyless hedonism, in which, having consumed all else, we start to prey upon ourselves. For this, we have destroyed the essence of humanity: our connectedness".

Yeah, I know it's the grauniad, but what's your view on this?

I'd say people are more lonely than ever before, it's affecting us and it's up to us to do something about it.

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/oct/14/age-of-loneliness-killing-us

SilverSurfer 1:25 Fri Oct 17
Re: Loneliness

It's a depression thing.

You can be lonely in a room full of friends.

BRANDED 12:57 Fri Oct 17
Re: Loneliness

My brother in law thinks that emptiness not loneliness is the problem. Being empty means you fail to have the ability to make much if life. No one needs to be lonely.

ironsofcanada 12:51 Fri Oct 17
Re: Loneliness

Never eaten in restaurant or been to a movie alone, not that I do either a whole lot. Just seems weird. Probably reveals some deep seeded psychological issue but there you go.

stomper 12:44 Fri Oct 17
Re: Loneliness

I suspect that loneliness (as opposed to solitude) is largely a result of the consumer culture that has developed since the 1950's. In this culture many people do not participate but wait to be entertained expecting interaction to come to them rather than making an effort to interact.

Billy Blagg 5:29 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

As a total loner I can't really understand what this is about. Quite happy to go to football, fims, cioncerts, festivals on me larry. I get on well with ME and always have done.

overbyyer 5:23 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Nurse Ratched wrote...

Re: Loneliness
I have no idea what people mean when they talk about loneliness. Or at least, I can only understand it on a theoretical level. There is always something interesting to do. Why is 'being by yourself' perceived as a problem or source of sadness? If anything, it's a blessed relief. Other people are pests, by and large.



Nurse, you are not describing loneliness, you are describing solitude, the difference being that solitude is enjoyable if you are surrounded by friends and family that you can escape from, but that you subconsciously know that are there for you when you tire of your own company

Compare that to the genuine loneliness of people who, for whatever reason, have no-one.

The Cult Of Bob 4:55 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Hugh Monteith 8:14 Thu Oct 16

With all those voices in your head, I doubt you're ever lonely, Hugh.

Lily Hammer 1:20 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Marston Hammer 1:11 Thu Oct 16


I think he posted as fordstar. An oracle of wisdom on all things, except quality midfielders. On that subject he had a form of mongist tourettes.

Marston Hammer 1:11 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Lily Hammer 10:18 Thu Oct 16

What was Kurt Vonnegut's username on here?

ohgodno 1:06 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

DB1983 12:47 Thu Oct 16

Why are they in a boat?

Lily Hammer 10:18 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

The wisdom of the late great Kurt Vonnegut, talking to graduates at their graduation ceremony. "What can I talk to them about? I know, I'll talk to them about dealing with the fear of leaving school and entering the grown up world."

After a sit down with some students to decide on what fears he could talk about, and after illiminating the dramatic unlikely fears like murder, torture etc, they nailed it down to two genuine fears: boredom, and loneliness.

Boredom is all part of being a grown up, perfectly natural.

Loneliness is completely unnatural and a modern thing. We should know lots of people and interact with them. You don't even have to like them, but you need lots of different input from lots of different heads.

These days, people go through life knowing just a handful of people. The wife , kids and colleagues are not enough.

Both boredom and loneliness can be defeated by getting out and joining up with any kind of group, club or society that shares a similar interest to you.

Obviously football helps a lot for those that go regularly. Anything will do though.....dance classes, jam sessions for musicians, a knitting club even. Anything that gets you out and interacting.


Even this site, to some extent, acts as a place to mix and take in loads of different opinions etc.

And so it goes.....

Monk~koknee 8:28 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

The social media enigma whereby people are becoming much less social could possibly lead to more loneliness in the long run. The ten to twenty good friends of old that you met and talked with has been inflated to 500+ facebook "friends" with whom you share photos of your dinner. People appear to go out less to generally socialise and spend more time in solitary entertainment either on TV or on-line. Previously, you watched want you really wanted to see on one of three channels but now you scan through hundreds of channels to find something that will suffice. Even when out in a cafe and bar with others people increasingly are unable to leave the phone alone for more than a few minutes. All quite strange.

Hugh Monteith 8:14 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

A society that actively sponsors less communication is afacet of the Problem

normannomates 2:31 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

London suberbia is pretty soul destroying stuff. Rows and rows of houses that seem permanently empty...might get a quick glimple of some human life on Monday putting the bin out night...the odd cunt on a Saturday.
Pretty fuckin depressing to be honest

arsegrapes 1:30 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

MrCrowmanSir 12:23 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

That's very true, good stuff. Never really thought about it until now, but I also struck up a friendship with an old boy about 65. I used to work in a shop in a station and he was the ticket collector Ted and always would have a chat. I knew him there for 14 years, then he said he had to retire, but wanted to work still and didn't know what to do.

I suggested gardening to keep active and he could start on mine and he agreed, within 6 months he was doing all the neighbours gardens and had bought himself a new car and chuffed. I moved abroad and lost contact a very nice man sadly now no longer with us.

Sydney_Iron 12:59 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Only the lonely (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)
Know the way I feel tonight (Ooh yay, yay, yay, yeah)
Only the lonely (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)
Know this feeling ain't right (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)

There goes my baby, there goes my heart
They're gone forever, so far apart
But only the lonely know wh-why-why I cry, only the lonely
(Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah, ooh yay, yay, yay, yeah)
(Oh, oh oh oh oh ooh-ah-ah, only the lonely, only the lonely)

Only the lonely (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)
Know the heartaches I've been through (Ooh yay, yay, yay, yeah
Only the lonely (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)
Know I cry and cry for you (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)

Maybe tomorrow a new romance
No-o-o more sorrow, but that's the chance
You've got to take, if your lonely heart breaks
Only the lonely (Dum-dumb-dummy doo-wah)

Sven Roeder 12:57 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Mate of mine used to pop in and see an elderly neighbour for a cup of tea sometimes when we were at university & he got home early. Picked up some shopping for him etc
Old boy died a few years later & left him enough to buy most of his current house.
Sounds suspicious but he genuinely didn't know that that was what he was going to do.

Balto 12:54 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

I am reading this at DreamForce the SalesForce Convention in San Francisco surrounded by 10,000 of thousands of people. My day has been spent listening to highly paid executives tell everyone their online, email, social media, digital campaign success stories. It's a lonely experience.

Hugh Monteith 12:48 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

A very good thread this Piccalilli. Nice one son

Hugh Monteith 12:48 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

A very good thread this Piccalilli. Nice one son

DB1983 12:47 Thu Oct 16
Re: Loneliness

Pragmatism is what separates the survivors from the perishers, and also what keeps the world turning.

You can sit there feeling shit about how bad things in the world are, or you can make the best of a bad situation no matter how harrowing or awful the state of the world today is.

There is ALWAYS someone in a worse boat than you.

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